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An Actual Trial in UK

This is from an actual trial in the UK :

A young woman who was several months pregnant boarded a bus. When She
noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account
of her condition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She
moved again and then on her third move he burst out
laughing..................

She had him arrested.

Then the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted
in such a manner.

His reply was: When the lady boarded the bus I couldn't help noticing she

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Good one

A woman wanted to reach her husband on his mobile phone but discovered that she was out of credit, She instructed her son to use his own phone to pass across an urgent message to his daddy who was on site. After junior had called, he got back to mummy to inform her that there was a lady that picked up daddy's phone the three times he tried reaching
dad on the mobile.

Women!!

She waited impatiently for her husband to return from work and upon seeing him in the driveway, she rushed out and gave him a
tight slap, and she slapped him again, for good measure.

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Husband Shopping

A store that sells husbands has just opened in Seattle where a woman may go
to choose a husband from among many men. The store is comprised of 6 floors,
and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the
flights. There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you
may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go
back down except to exit the building. So a woman goes to the shopping
center to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs.

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Very interesting Law

*Brains x Beauty x Availability = Constant***

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Funny marriage quotes

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.

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Love Algorithm

This algorithm has been tested and works fine.

1. Search for a most-beautiful girl.Find a way to talk to her. Finding a
reason depends on your skill.
You have to find a reason because she would never approach no matter how
frustrated she is.

2. If you don't succeed got to step 1 again.

3. Start with some concrete point and slowly slowly shift to her personal
details.

4. Ask her for coffee like: "You are busy right?".She will say "No". and
then "You don't like coffee?".
No direct thing like "Would you please come for coffee with me?"

5. Asking for lunch:

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Stanley Cup

Stanley Cup

It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat
right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is
empty. He leans over and asks his neighbour if someone will be sitting
there. "No," says the neighbour. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible",
said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for final
game of the Stanley Cup playoffs and not use it?" The neighbour says "Well,
actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but

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Stress Relievers

Stress Reliever # 1

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?

Hubby: When there is a problem, no matter how

impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.

Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?

Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can
there be greater than this one?"
______________________________________________________________________

Stress Reliever # 2

Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and
lighten your burden.

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Logical Reasoning

1) Teacher tells a student a=b, b=c so a=c tell me another example.

Student: I love u - u love your daughter - so I love your daughter.

2) Three fastest means of communication telephone - television - tell

A women

3) Its funny when people discuss over "love marriage" and "arrange

marriage" It is like asking a person if he would like to "hang

himself" or "shoot himself".

4) What is a girl friend? Addition of problems - subtraction of money

multiplication of enemies - division of friends.

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