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Universal Laws

  1. Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair
    After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
  2. Anthony's Law of the Workshop
    Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
  3. Kovac's Conundrum
    When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.
  4. Cannon's Karmic Law
    If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tyre, the next morning you will have a flat tyre.
  5. O'brien's Variation Law
    If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
  6. Bell 's Theorem
    When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.
  7. Ruby's Principle of Close Encounters
    The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
  8. Willoughby 's Law
    When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
  9. Zadra's Law of Biomechanics
    The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
  10. Breda's Rule
    At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
  11. Owen's Law
    As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
  12. Howden's Law
    You remember you have to mail a letter only when you're near the mailbox.
  13. And the last and best:

  14. Murphy's Law
    What has to go wrong will go wrong.

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