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Funny marriage quotes

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.

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Convocation address delivered by Dr.R.A.Mashelkar, Director General, CSIR, at the 4th Convocation of IIIT-H

Following is the (truly inspiring) convocation address delivered by Dr. R.A.
Mashelkar, Director General, CSIR, at the 4th Convocation of our institute on
20th August 2005.

"India's Future: "IT" as in "Indian Talent"

1. Dr. Y.S. Rajasekhara Reddy, Hon.ble Chief Minister of Andhra Pradesh,
Prof. Rajeev Sangal, Director, International Institute of Information
Technology, Hyderabad, proud graduates, their equally proud parents and
friends, all members of the family of IIIT, distinguished guests, ladies
and gentlemen.

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Update

After a break, there are new updates to the site.

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Dilbert's Theorem on Salary

Dilbert's Theorem on Salary states that engineers and scientists
never
earn as much salary as business executives, sales people &
Management guys
This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation
based on the
following three postulates:

Postulate 1:
Knowledge is Power (Knowledge=Power)

Postulate 2:
Time is Money (Time=Money)

Postulate 3:
(as every engineer knows): Power =Work/Time

It therefore follows:

Knowledge = Work / Time

and since Time = Money, we have:

Knowledge = Work / Money.

Solving for Money, we get:

Money = Work/Knowledge

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Stanley Cup

Stanley Cup

It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat
right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is
empty. He leans over and asks his neighbour if someone will be sitting
there. "No," says the neighbour. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible",
said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for final
game of the Stanley Cup playoffs and not use it?" The neighbour says "Well,
actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but

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Love Algorithm

This algorithm has been tested and works fine.

1. Search for a most-beautiful girl.Find a way to talk to her. Finding a
reason depends on your skill.
You have to find a reason because she would never approach no matter how
frustrated she is.

2. If you don't succeed got to step 1 again.

3. Start with some concrete point and slowly slowly shift to her personal
details.

4. Ask her for coffee like: "You are busy right?".She will say "No". and
then "You don't like coffee?".
No direct thing like "Would you please come for coffee with me?"

5. Asking for lunch:

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Speech by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple

-------------------------
Stanford Report, June 14, 2005

'You've got to find what you love,' Jobs says
This is the text of the Commencement address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple
Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, delivered on June 12, 2005.

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the
finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth
be told, this is the closest I've ever gotten to a college graduation.
Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That's it. No big
deal. Just three stories.

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Eight Monkeys

I guess we follow this... honestly....

This one is brilliant.....read on ..it makes lot of
sense! Put eight monkeys in a room. In the middle of
the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas
hanging from a hook on the ceiling. Each time a monkey
tries to climb the ladder, all the other monkeys are
sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable.
Soon enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the
ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be
sprayed, set upon him and beat him up. Soon, none of
the eight monkeys ever attempts to climb the ladder.

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1ly 4 crazy sms lovers

SMS Short Cuts:

1dRfl - wonderful
2 - to/too/two
2dA - today
2moro - tomorrow
2nite - tonite
3dom - freedom
4 - for
4get - forget
4N - foreign
ADN - any day now
AFAIK - as far as I know
AFAIR - as far as I recall
ASAP - as soon as possible
ATM - at the moment
B - be
B4 - before
B4N - bye for now
BB - bye-bye
Bf -boyfriend
BG - big grin
BION - believe it or not
BK - big kiss
BTDT - been there, done that
BTW - by the way
By - busy
C - see/sea
CB - call back
CUL - see you later
CWYL - chat with you later
DUZ - does
DUZNT - doesn't
F2F - free to talk?

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