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What Indian guys do when they stay alone with a gal?

A ship sank in high seas and the following people got stranded in the middle
of nowhere.

2 Italian men and 1 italian woman
2 French men and 1 french woman
2 German men and 1 german woman
2 Greek men and 1 greek woman
2 Polish men and 1 polish woman
2 Mexican men and 1 mexican woman
2 Irish men and 1 irish woman
2 American men and 1 american woman
2 Indian men and 1 indian woman

One month later, on various parts of the island the following was observed.

A- one italian killed the other italian man for the italian woman.

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Some Application and Leave Letters

1. A candidate's application: "This has reference to
your advertisement calling for a 'typist and an accountant - Male or
Female'... As I am both for the past several years and I can handle
both, I am applying for
the post.

2. An employee applied for leave as follows: Since I
have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife. Please
sanction me one week leave.

3. Another employee applied for half day leave as
follows: "Since I've to go to the cremation ground and I may not
return,
please grant me half day casual leave"

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Indian Mathematics

SSC + HSC + BMS + MBA = UNEMPLOYMENT .

An Idea + An Idiot = A Dot com.

One Chinese gymnast = India's Gold Medal tally since 1896

Sushmita Sen - 1.2 feet = Salman Khan.

Special Effects in Shampoo ads = Special effects in Jurassic park.

4 weeks in Switzerland + London + New Zealand + Canada = 4 minute song
in Hindi movie.

Ajay Devgan + cosmetic surgery + acting ability + personality + own

production company = Kajol

Rona dhona x Bewafai x Badle ki aag = Your mom's favorite serials.

Amitabh Bachchan - Mrityudaata + Kaun Banega Crorepati = A SUPERSTAR.

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Reply to Letter

This story is about a rather strange reply for a
campground reservation. It is said to be true,
but you be the judge.

A woman who was rather old-fashioned, delicate,
and elegant - especially in her language - was
planning a week's vacation in Florida so she wrote
to a particular campground and asked for a
reservation.

She wanted to make sure the campground was fully
equipped, but didn't quite know how to ask about
the toilet facilities. She just couldn't bring
herself to write the word 'TOILET' in her letter.
After much deliberation, she finally came up with

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Garden Plow

The phone rings at FBI headquarters.

"Hello?"
"Hello, is this the FBI?"
"Yes. What do you want?"

"I'm calling to report my neighbor Adrian Thibodeaux, who is hiding
marijuana inside his firewood logs."

"Thank you very much for the call, sir."

Next day, the FBI agents descend on Thibodeaux's house. They search the
shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of
wood, but find no marijuana. They glare at Thibodeaux and leave.

The phone rings at Thibodeaux's house.

"Hey, Adrian! Did the FBI come?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they chop your firewood?"

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Professor Plumber

One professor of mathematics noticed that his
kitchen sink at his home broke down. He called a plumber. The
plumber came on the next day, sealed a few screws and
everything was working as before. The professor was delighted.
However, when the plumber gave him the bill a minute
later, he was shocked.
"This is one third of my monthly salary!" he yelled.
Well, he paid and then the plumber said to him:
"I understand your position as a professor.
Why don't you come to our company and apply for a plumber
position? You will earn three times as much as a
professor.

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Telugu Movie Direction

How ridiculous can direction get! Here is a sample. This describes three
scenes in the movie "Sambhavi IPS" starring the ACTION heroine
VijayShanti.

Courtesy: www.fullhyd.com
Link : http://www.fullhyderabad.com/scripts/profiles.php3?section=Movies&name=S...

Sambhavi IPS
------------

Cast : Vijayashanti, Telangana Shakuntala, Costume Krishna
Director: Nageshwara Rao

SCENE 1
-------
Vijayashanti has three thugs chasing her. She has only one bullet in her
pistol. She takes out a knife and places it before the gun. The bullet

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Woman and the Frog

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.

The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three 3 wishes." The woman freed the frog. The frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes-that whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times more or better!"
The woman said, "That would be okay."

For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this

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Hind Sight

Guy Kawasaki is one of founders of Apple Computer who helped create the Macintosh computer.
--------

"Hindsight"
by
Guy Kawasaki

Palo Alto High School Baccalaureate Speech 6/11/95

Speaking to you today marks a milestone in my life. I am 40
years old. 22 years ago, when I was in your seat, I never,
ever thought I wouldbe 40 years old.

The implications of being your speaker frightens me. For one
thing, when a 40 year old geeser spoke at my baccalaureate
ceremony, he was about the last person I'd believe. I have

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Positivism

On Embracing a Religion called 'Positivism'

=====================================================================
Prof R A Mashelkar, Director General, Council of Scientific and
Industrial Research (CSIR), New Delhi delivered the Convocation Address
at University of Delhi on 22nd February 2003. He said "Take our
space programme. The R&D budget of this programme was US $ 450 million
last year. The R&D budget for General Motors was around seven
billion dollars. What is it that our space programme has achieved?

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