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Match Fixing

This joke was probably written in 2000 home series when SA ended up 2-0 in tests and 3-3 in ODIs, if I am right.:-)

A bookie calls Hansie Cronje before the match between India and SouthAfrica.
Cell phone rings. Hansie picks up.
Cronje : hello
Bookie : I am ....... Here.
Cronje : yes tell me
Bookie : how is the pitch
Cronje : ya dry and good for batting
Bookie : I want u to lose today's match
Cronje : impossible
Bookie : I will pay u $200,000
Cronje : will be difficult to make India win.
Bookie : I will pay u $250,000

Category: 
Technical

Software Guy Proposal Letter

Have you ever wondered how a software guy would
propose?

Well, here is a template ...

Dear Ms. ABC,

Baby, I've seen you yesterday while surfing on
local railway platform and realized that you are
the only site I was browsing for. For long time,
I have been lonely, trying to find a bug in my
life and you can be a real debugger for me now.
My life is just an uncompiled program without you
which never produces an executable code and hence
is useless.

Category: 
Technical

Sprite Ad

New AD - Imagine urself in Sprite Ad...

Your Colleague : Hey !! Kya yahan baitha mail forward karta rahta hai yaar !! Naye packages dekh.... Naye language seekh…. Night out Maar....Fundoo programming kar like me....! Do something cool man !!
You: Achha ! To usse Kya hoga ..
Your Colleague : Impression !!! Appraisal !!! Har appraisal main tu No 1! Hike in salary !! Extra Stocks
You : Phir kya hoga...
Your Colleague: Project Leader ban jaayega..Phir Project Manager !!! Phir Business Manager ! One day U will be a Director of the Company man !!
You : Acchha to phir kya hoga...

Category: 
Technical

IT Support

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed that the
new program began making an expected changes to the accounting modules,
limiting access to flower and jewellery applications that had operated
flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many
other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed undesirable
programs such as NBA 3.0. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and HouseCleaning
2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these
problems, but to no avail.

Desperate Wife.

Category: 
Technical

Talking Frog

A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said:
"If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."

He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said: "If you kiss me and turn me back into a
beautiful princess, I will tell everyone how smart and brave you are and
how you are my hero."

The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to
his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said: "If you kiss me and turn me back into a

Category: 
Technical

World of Romance

World of romance

In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman
happy.
Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes
and
points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something
she
expects.
Sorry, that's the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the
point
system:

SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)

You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)

You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) In the snow (+8) But return
with

Category: 
Genders

Words Woman Use

WORDS WOMEN USE
******************************
FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you(guys)
need to shut up.

FIVE MINUTES
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes
is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes
to watch the game before helping around the house.

NOTHING
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and
you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing'

Category: 
Genders

Woman and the Frog

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.

The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three 3 wishes." The woman freed the frog. The frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes-that whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times more or better!"
The woman said, "That would be okay."

For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this

Category: 
Genders

Views on Wives

These are the views of some really great people about a wife. If U diagree with it just delete it , else save it. But remember ur diagreeal doesn't make a difference as I guess these people who have stated these are far more intellectual than we are ............... So just enjoy :-) !

Every man should get married sometime;
after all, happiness is not the only
thing in life!!
--Kevin.

---------------------------------------
An archaeologist is the best husband
a woman can have; the older she gets the more
interested he is in her.
--Agatha Christie

Category: 
Genders

Social Family

Maria a beautiful Latina fell in love with Jose. She planned to marry very soon. She was so happy about her wedding plans, she decided to tell her papa.

Papa told her, "Maria, you'll have to find another. Your Mother does not know this, but Jose is your half-brother". So Maria forgot about her Jose, and soon planned to marry Ricardo.

But after telling papa again, he said, "Maria there's trouble still. You cannot marry Ricardo, my darling. Please don't tell your mother, but Ricardo is your half-brother too."

Category: 
Genders

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