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Living in 2004

You know you're living in 2004, when...
1. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

4. You e-mail your mate who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friendsis that they do not have e-mail addresses.

6. When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.

7. When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "0" to get an outside line.

Category: 
Technical

IT Deewar

I T - Deewar connection :

Conversation between an "IT guy" and "Daily Wage Construction Worker"

IT guy - Mere pass paisa hai....
Mere pass Daulat hai....
Bank Balance hai...
IT Sector ka naam hai....
Stock Options hai.....
Tere paas kya hai???

Daily Wage Construction Worker - (Softly) Mere paas kaam hai....!!!

Category: 
Technical

Selling Cola in Arab

One day I met a friend of mine. He was a salesman for a Cola company,
posted in the Middle East. Seeing him back home,
I got surprised and asked," Weren't you supposed to be in Arabia?"

He gave his account thus.
"I got posted in the Middle East. I was very confident that I will make a
good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown
there. But I had a problem as I didn't know to speak Arabic. So I planned
to convey the message through pictures. I
made 3 posters:

First - A man crawling through the hot desert sand totally exhausted and
panting.

Category: 
Misc

What Indian guys do when they stay alone with a gal?

A ship sank in high seas and the following people got stranded in the middle
of nowhere.

2 Italian men and 1 italian woman
2 French men and 1 french woman
2 German men and 1 german woman
2 Greek men and 1 greek woman
2 Polish men and 1 polish woman
2 Mexican men and 1 mexican woman
2 Irish men and 1 irish woman
2 American men and 1 american woman
2 Indian men and 1 indian woman

One month later, on various parts of the island the following was observed.

A- one italian killed the other italian man for the italian woman.

Category: 
Misc

Some Application and Leave Letters

1. A candidate's application: "This has reference to
your advertisement calling for a 'typist and an accountant - Male or
Female'... As I am both for the past several years and I can handle
both, I am applying for
the post.

2. An employee applied for leave as follows: Since I
have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife. Please
sanction me one week leave.

3. Another employee applied for half day leave as
follows: "Since I've to go to the cremation ground and I may not
return,
please grant me half day casual leave"

Category: 
Misc

Telugu Movie Direction

How ridiculous can direction get! Here is a sample. This describes three
scenes in the movie "Sambhavi IPS" starring the ACTION heroine
VijayShanti.

Courtesy: www.fullhyd.com
Link : http://www.fullhyderabad.com/scripts/profiles.php3?section=Movies&name=S...

Sambhavi IPS
------------

Cast : Vijayashanti, Telangana Shakuntala, Costume Krishna
Director: Nageshwara Rao

SCENE 1
-------
Vijayashanti has three thugs chasing her. She has only one bullet in her
pistol. She takes out a knife and places it before the gun. The bullet

Category: 
Misc

Professor Plumber

One professor of mathematics noticed that his
kitchen sink at his home broke down. He called a plumber. The
plumber came on the next day, sealed a few screws and
everything was working as before. The professor was delighted.
However, when the plumber gave him the bill a minute
later, he was shocked.
"This is one third of my monthly salary!" he yelled.
Well, he paid and then the plumber said to him:
"I understand your position as a professor.
Why don't you come to our company and apply for a plumber
position? You will earn three times as much as a
professor.

Category: 
Misc

Garden Plow

The phone rings at FBI headquarters.

"Hello?"
"Hello, is this the FBI?"
"Yes. What do you want?"

"I'm calling to report my neighbor Adrian Thibodeaux, who is hiding
marijuana inside his firewood logs."

"Thank you very much for the call, sir."

Next day, the FBI agents descend on Thibodeaux's house. They search the
shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of
wood, but find no marijuana. They glare at Thibodeaux and leave.

The phone rings at Thibodeaux's house.

"Hey, Adrian! Did the FBI come?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they chop your firewood?"

Category: 
Misc

Reply to Letter

This story is about a rather strange reply for a
campground reservation. It is said to be true,
but you be the judge.

A woman who was rather old-fashioned, delicate,
and elegant - especially in her language - was
planning a week's vacation in Florida so she wrote
to a particular campground and asked for a
reservation.

She wanted to make sure the campground was fully
equipped, but didn't quite know how to ask about
the toilet facilities. She just couldn't bring
herself to write the word 'TOILET' in her letter.
After much deliberation, she finally came up with

Category: 
Misc

HR Proposal Letter

Ever wondered how a HR Manager could write a love letter to his girl friend.

To,

Juliet

Sub: Offer of love!

Ref: Meeting in coffee shop!

Dearest Ms Juliet,

Category: 
Technical

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