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A person travelling in a deluxe car and he got struck in a desert..........he wants to take a bath with soap and water.......there is no water anywhere in the vicinity..........guess how he manages to take the bath in the desert

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So here is the answer :

As he is having a 'd lux' car..........he will integrate it and hence the d(derivator) symbol will cancel out and he will get

lux + c(constant of integration)...........so he will get c(sea) and lux(soap)..........and he will enjoy taking a bath......

Category: 
Poor Jokes

Stupid Question and Answer

10 stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations and some
equally stupid answers:-

1. At the movies:
When you meet quaintances/friends Stupid Question:-Hey, what are you doing
here?
A: Well,it's so hot , there were no cool cabs so I thought I'd watch some
advertisements in the cool comfort of the theatre.

2. In the bus:
A fat girl wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet Stupid Question:-Sorry, did that hurt?
A: No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia why don't you try again or
should i try this time."

3. At a funeralne of the teary-eyed people

Category: 
One Liners

SMS

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Good morning...Have u done two of the most important things when you
wake up today?

1)Pray, so that u may live... 2)Take a bath-so that others may live too!

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Can u pronounce good English:- read along woof, roof, loof, shoof,
shoof,

woof, loof, roof, poof, woof woof, hoof, woof, roof, shoof.

Test results:

U r a good dog. Now stop barking.

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Category: 
One Liners

Stupid Questions and Smart Answers

STUPID QUESTIONS WITH THE SMART ANSWERS:

BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??

GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??

BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!

Category: 
One Liners

Sher Shayari

1) tum aa gaye ho ;
noor aa gaya hai
chalo teeno movie chalen

2) Maine tujhe sau-sau khat likhe,
tune kisi ka bhi jawab nahi diya;
kahin tere dil mein raddi ki tokri to nahi?

3) Door se dekha to paani baras raha tha Door se dekha to paani baras raha tha
Paas gaya. to bheeg gaya.

4) jise dil diya woh dilli chali gayi
jise pyar kiya woh italy chali gayi
dil ne kaha khud kushi(sucide) kar le jalim
bijali ko haath lagaya to bijali chali gayi

5) Humne bhi pyar kiya tha jindgi main,
badi joshh ke sath !
Humne bhi pyar kiya tha jindgi main,

Category: 
One Liners

Some good punch lines

Some great punch lines
1. I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, and therefore I'm perfect.

2. I've got to sit down and work out where I stand.

3. If I save time, when do I get it back?

4. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

5. I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

6. Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.

7. The statement below is true.
The statement above is false.

8. As I said before, I never repeat myself.

9. Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.

10. I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence.

Category: 
One Liners

Crazy Question and Answer

Crazy Q & A

1) Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?

2) My father is so old that when he was in
school, history was called current affairs.

3) Teacher: Now, children, if I saw a man
beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue
would I be showing?
Student: Brotherly love.

4) Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you
say prayers before eating?
Sam : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a
good cook.

5). Manager: Sorry,but i can't give u a job. I
don't need much help.
Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just

Category: 
One Liners

The Coffin

A pretty woman was serving a life sentence in prison. Angry
and resentful about her situation, she had decided that she
would rather die than to live another year in prison. Over the
years she had become good friends with one of the prison
caretakers.

His job, among others, was to bury those prisoners who died
in a graveyard just outside the prison walls. When a prisoner
died, the caretaker rang a bell, which was heard by everyone.
The caretaker then got the body and put it in a casket.

Next, he entered his office to fill out the death certificate before

Category: 
Misc

Husband And Wives

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to
concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked
sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"

Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
_____________________________________________________

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat
everything
to men...

Category: 
Genders

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