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The Bum

While walking down the street, a bum asks a man for $2.

"Will you buy booze?" the man asks, to which the bum replies "No."

"Will you gamble it away?"

Once again the bum replies "No."

Then the man asks, "Will you come home with me so my wife can see what
happens to a man who doesn't drink or gamble?"


Husband And Wives

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to
concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked
sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"

Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat
to men...


World of Romance

World of romance

In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman
Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes
points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something
Sorry, that's the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the

You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)

You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)

You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) In the snow (+8) But return


Words Woman Use

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you(guys)
need to shut up.

If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes
is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes
to watch the game before helping around the house.

This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and
you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing'


Woman and the Frog

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.

The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three 3 wishes." The woman freed the frog. The frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes-that whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times more or better!"
The woman said, "That would be okay."

For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this


Views on Wives

These are the views of some really great people about a wife. If U diagree with it just delete it , else save it. But remember ur diagreeal doesn't make a difference as I guess these people who have stated these are far more intellectual than we are ............... So just enjoy :-) !

Every man should get married sometime;
after all, happiness is not the only
thing in life!!

An archaeologist is the best husband
a woman can have; the older she gets the more
interested he is in her.
--Agatha Christie


Social Family

Maria a beautiful Latina fell in love with Jose. She planned to marry very soon. She was so happy about her wedding plans, she decided to tell her papa.

Papa told her, "Maria, you'll have to find another. Your Mother does not know this, but Jose is your half-brother". So Maria forgot about her Jose, and soon planned to marry Ricardo.

But after telling papa again, he said, "Maria there's trouble still. You cannot marry Ricardo, my darling. Please don't tell your mother, but Ricardo is your half-brother too."


Some funny quotes on Man And Woman

Smart man + Smart women = Romance
Smart man + Dumb women = Pregnancy
Dumb man + Smart women = Affair
Dumb man + Dumb women = marriage
Smart boss + Smart employee = Profits
Smart boss + Dumb employee = Production
Dumb boss + Smart employee = Promotion
Dumb boss + Dumb employee = Overtime


A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't

A woman worries about the future until she gets a


New Element In Periodic Table

A new element called woman:

A new element has to be added in the Periodic Table
which is recommended by my experienced friend.

Element : Woman
Symbol : Wo
Discoverer : Adam Edenwarden
Atomic mass: Accepted as 53.6 kg; isotopes vary from
35 - 200 kg.
Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban areas.

1. Surface usually covered with thin painted film
2. Boils at room Temperature
3. Freezes without any known reason
4. Melts if given special treatment
5. Bitter if incorrectly used



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